Hi all - as you may know while I was away I often "wrote" my blog on Word then pasted it here when I had a chance - so while I was traveling between the "I'm in the business class lounge" to "i'm home -thank God" I wrote some....here it is......
(btw - -suffering from jetlag - more than I have ever experienced before....not nice!)
......it's a long one........(remember I wrote it a few days ago)
Welll I only got to post the previous item when we arrived in hong kong --- unfortunately we ran out of time – both internet time as well as ‘waiting’ time…we had to go and get on—so I mentioned that we were “upgraded” to business class – weelllll we were ever upgraded! Holy crap!
Have you ever flown business class?? (I think it’s considered executive class on Air Canada) Anyhow have you ever? Holy Moly it is wicked!
So Reg Economy ticket – you go to board, grab a paper if you want one, you get on - struggle to get your stuff in the overhead baggage. If you are short like me – hope that there are tall people next to you to help get your stuff up there if you aren’t the first person to use the overhead bins!! (don’t count on Stewardess/Stewards – they are looking after the elderly, people traveling with children etc)
Ok so you sit down – let’s say I’m not a little girl – if I’m on the edge fine – otherwise scoot by ppl already seated and plunk your butt down – try to put stuff in the ‘magazine holder’ in front of you – enough to keep you busy – remember by the time you take off 5 other ppl will have put there stuff on top of yours so good luck getting anything later! Watch your elbows – don’t want to take an eye out.
OK so you sit down – announcements—more announcements – and a few more…finally take off….no music/stuff to do – safety instructions – no tv for 45 mins….after which you get a light snack and a drink (in a plastic cup or Styrofoam if it’s hot (we know how I love Styrofoam!!)
Meal comes in a “microwave, reuasable plastic dish, with plastic utensils(1 each of fork, knife, spoon), salt and pepper in packets! An example of a meal is “beef and noodles” with green beans and 2 carrot coins—a dry salad roll – a salad made of cukes and tomatoes…dessert a brownie. At the end of your meal you get this “hot cloth” which is made of the same fabric as J-cloths—it’s basically a wet j-cloth that is hot (depending on which seat you have that is) that you use to “refresh your self” . Repeat depending on how long the flight.
OK so we get upgraded (on the shortest flight that we have ) - so we get on …. As I’m walking down the aisle there’s a steward there asking to help me put my bags up ---taking my jacket--- - as soon as that is done – as I “sashay” (I use the word sashay so that you can get an idea that there was no “scooting” or sucking in) to my seat, my butt has barely touched the seat and Mr. Steward asks – holding a tray of mini “wine glasses” - would you like a drink? Orange juice, apple juice, champagne? ….OH HRH Martha Sue – accepts the glass of orange juice – you guys---no one else had boarded the plane - - ppl were still getting on….are you getting’ what I’m givin?
Oh then there’s Mr. Steward…Madam..would you like paper? “Sure I’ll have the south china one” (as if – I barely read the paper at home..lol). So….i’m sipping my Orange Juice – reading my paper – the plane hasn’t even started moving yet – I’m relaxed….ahhhhhhh
So the plane takes off….around comes the “hot towel ---not a hot j-cloth – a hot towel – handtowel that is - -to use to wipe your face – to refresh yourself – we had barely taken off!!
In the seat I find those gigantic headphones – you know the ones they block outside noises - -they look like the ones that protect people who work around loud noises use. OK so then the seatbelt light goes off. I look – oh all these automatic buttons. I start pressing them…I basically recline into a semi-lying down position (I probably could have lyed down---but it was a 1.5 hour flight and I knew we were being served a meal.)
So I’m “lounging” yes Lounging is the best word…reading my book thinking HOLY CRAP - this is the life! When Mr, Steward comes with the “Menu” for dinner - -MENU? WTF? OH Ok so you still only had 2 choices but you had a MENU…
So meal comes I choose the beef with some fancy sauce…– all glass dinnerware, including a salad fork, dinner fork, dessert fork, 2 knives, also wrapped up was dental floss / tooth pick. But to start we have a bowl of fruit, then your choice of bread comes--- either that Foccaicia type (can’t spell!) or garlic bread – you have your entrée (with REAL salt and pepper shakers) and then dessert – a “proper” size piece of Cheesecake with a blueberry sauce on top with fresh raspberries “strewn” on top! YUM!! And of course coffee for your dessert – and I don’t mean a Styrofoam cup of burnt coffee – it’s a yummy cup of coffee in a clay Mug!! After this – another hot towel. So still lounging, reading, drinking my coffee – ahh this is the life…..
Pilot announces that we are starting our descent. Around comes another towel – a stewardess comes around and puts my seat in the proper upright position – no they don’t’ ask you to…they do it….i think it’s so that you don’t injure your finger pressing the buttons….then they go and get your jacket and hang it on the little coat rack thing that’s installed in the front of the seat in front of you….so as soon as the plane lands the stewardess are around getting your things ready for you - -UMM economy has to wait until the plane stops! Not us! LOL
As we leave that plane I have to say there is a feeling of sadness and dread – I mean we know what’s coming….a 15 hour flight in “steerage” oops I mean economy – BUT now we *know* what it *could* have been…it’s worse…I mean before you could “imagine” what it was like in Business/exec class and just think - woopteedoo…..they have “slightly” bigger seats…UMM – that’s just not the case---these are freaking amazing seats!!!
So we get to Hong Kong airport and all is rather uneventful…well I did put my pj bottoms on – I know you look forward to that Wes! Sorry dear – need to be compfy!
So we are now on the plane from Hong Kong to Toronto. I’m sitting beside “good people” I have sat beside “not good people” before and man oh man – I’m lucky…except for a four year old behind us - - who was fine at the beginning of the trip – I mean he was a bit hyper but I thought ….ahhhh cute…so excited to travel….. well about 1 hour into the trip he started talking and talking loudly – and NEVER SHUT UP FOR THE NEXT 6 HOURS. Shreiking and going on…etc.. his parents ordered him Coke twice…OMG -the stewardess is like – are you sure? You don’t’ want him to be too hyper it’s a long flight….”Nope---He wants it” --- ok I try really hard not to judge people on such matters – maybe it’s a one time treat – maybe it was “part of the experience” for this little guy - so one glass I’m like – well he’s a bit hyper now but one cup …and it’s just the beginning of the trip right? Yep they order him another….he’s kicking the seat in front on him – the girl is being very patient but he’s not stopping…. So he’s talking very loudly - stewardess is saying “use your indoor voice please” the parents are “tee heeing”…ummmm ok…this is making me nervous….I haven’t slept all night –it’s now as though I got up at 8am and it’s now 2 am and we have like 13 hours ahead(on this plane)…I have to sleep……so I’m thinking be calm….so after 5 hours of this – I dozed off …only to be woken by his shrieking – I get up….I go to the back of the plane where the washrooms are - -the girl beside me follows ---I’m standing there…and I’m like “OH MY GOODNESS – he’s never going to shut his mouth” she’s like…”I’m glad you said that…he’s not stopping”(and he wasn’t when I went by his parents were “half dozing” and he was “going” --- so we go to the stewardess and say “please do not give him pop (they explained they didn’t want to –they could see how hyper he was - but basically have been told to “do what the parents say”---they explained that they had received letters in the past complaining cause one of the stewardess “encouraged” a child to say please and thank you (probably by withholding whatever it was) and the parents wrote in – I have to tell you that really ticks me off…..I mean really ticks me off….who thinks that they do not HAVE to say please and thank you – that is so disrespectful – it makes me want to scream – I bet if tables were turned – there would be please/thank yous….what is that teaching kids? No wonder kids are rude – sheesh…. I don’t care what people think of Air Canada or anyone - if someone waits on you…please and thank you use please and thank you!
OK sorry off on a tangent there! – So they are not surprised and say that they will go talk to the parents which they do – and of course he’s half asleep when they go by --- finally! (Oh I also suggested that if pop was offered and if they said he wanted it…tell them No and to talk to me..LOL…. ) I mean really – if you had a hyper 4 year old…he was jumping up and down on the seats as they were boarding the plane….wouldn’t you “do something” I could think of a few things….first – to ensure they don’t get sick…GRAVOL - -I mean really it’s doing double duty – you truly don’t want them to be sick – and sleep…..second…tylenol…….third…turn the TV off……it’s dark all around….fourth – walk him around the plane…..wear him down….fifth – for god sakes DO NOT GIVE HIM caffeinated POP!!!!!!!!!!! Sixth – teach “inside voice?!”
As you can see –he got me wound!! So after the 8 + hours of constant talking it appears he has slept for a couple hours…we are at hour number 14 and so far so good – what a relief…however I hear him stirring behind us…..
God I cannot wait to come home to my please and thank you sayin’ girls who know when to be quiet!!! (and my honey and my bed….) Only 8 hours left…..is that right?? Its 441 per the clock on the pc! And I’ll be home by 12pm!